Here’s some tips (used by performers – true story!) to help calm your first wedding dance or wedding day nerves:
Practice the power pose behind the scenes – proven to boost confidence.
Roll the shoulders back and lift the chest to stand tall and proud.
Find ways to relax the face – tension in the face could bring tension into the rest of the body.
Find a way to help calm the mind – whether mindfulness, visualisation, meditation – whatever works for you. Perhaps find a routine to practice on the morning of your wedding to help chill the mind.
Practise a breathing technique you could try in the moment – pull yourselves to the side and have a little powwow breathing pattern that you’ve tried in advance and links you to a chance to centre you into the moment.
Find an essential oil blend toolkit that you can carry in your wedding day essentials kit or handbag and keep the oils near for the day – have a little sniff of to energise you, calm you, relieve a tension headache…whatever you think you’ll need!
Take a look at the Insta Reel below for some inspiration 🙂
I have one thing to say: THE BREATH IS POWERFUL!!!
🦋We’re emerging out of Lockdown 🤞🏻 from our hermit like existence. Like butterflies from our cocoons!🦋 So if Wedding Day or First Dance Nerves feel out of control after months of minimal human contact, I’ve got your covered.
We have a ‘road map’, so let’s create a plan to physically and mentally prepare for the first dance and for unleashing your gorgeous selves to the wider world beyond your household and soon enough, to your guests at your wedding. There’s no better way to make the final days to freedom count (whenever that may be).
I’ve got a series of blogs to read, starting with the importance of preparing in advance for the first dance. STARTING FIRST DANCE LESSONS SOONER RATHER THAN LATER will mean the dance will become like second nature, just like walking, and the nerves will stay at the door.
I can support you with: 💪🏼 Physical fitness and strength through a bespoke Pilates programme; 💃🏾First Wedding Dance lessons; 🗓 A plan for scheduling in key timeline priorities in your wedding planning,
Which in turn will: 💃🏾🕺🏾improve your self-confidence and 🧘🏻♀️prepare the mind to calm wedding day and first dance nerves.
Amongst so many other physical and emotional health and wellbeing benefits that come with fitness and first dance… and help you leave any anxieties behind with the Lockdown!!
I’m so pleased to have been involved teaching some First Wedding Dance and Hen Dance Party style movement to the gorgeous models (who were really fab!) – you may spot my little star as Flower Girl got featured – she loved it as much as I did. 🤩 I showcased all the feels of having a final first dance rehearsal or hen party in a glorious wedding venue (read here about why this is important for me), to really enhance the gorgeous experience of learning to dance together.
Take me back to this glorious hot summer day please. If anything is going to get us excited about Summer weddings, it’s this STUNNER of a relaxed luxury wedding styled shoot in the countryside organised to a ‘T’ by Mrs T Weddings alongside an incredible team. The photos by Hester Barnes Wedding Photography are outstanding ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
FRESH. COLOURFUL. UNIQUE. GLAMOUR. “Almost as though it would have come out of Chanel advert”. Rock My Wedding – read the full edit here.
See who was involved in the incredible team below the images and video.
Maybe you’re sitting on the fence about whether or not to have first wedding dance lessons, or you’re sure you can crack the code to creating a fabulous first dance yourselves, but just don’t know where to start.
You might have even downloaded the free Find Your First Dance Music and Style Guide by now and are feeling inspired.
So I’m giving away my trade first dance choreography secrets in a step by step DIY Your First Wedding Dance Manual and LIVE Online Masterclass.
The guide is download-able and designed to accompany a one hour Masterclass with me! This masterclass will set you up with some clear steps to help you push forward with alllllll the choreographic tools to help you plan your very own first dance! I’ll include: how to find inspiration; how to learn some basic first dance steps; how to listen to your song and put the moves to it; some key practice tips and ways to help with first wedding dance nerves. There is so much we’ll cover – crazy huh?!
You see I think everyone can become a choreographer when we’re considering your own first dance dreams, desires and personalities!
It’s Hazel and Rich’s Wedding Anniversary, so I thought I’d share their success story and 4 reasons to have the final first wedding dance rehearsal in your wedding venue – as Hazel & Rich did at the stunning wedding venue, Cain Manor! Scroll to the bottom to see the full rehearsal.
Happy Wedding Anniversary to this lovely pair. How fabulous is their jive? So much fun! Neither of them had danced like this, let alone jived, before. They looked so chilled. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 The final rehearsal with me in their wedding venue made all the difference. This was an incredible opportunity for Hazel and Rich to get into their wedding venue, get mentally prepared for the first dance and get a feel for how it’s going to feel, in the space on their wedding day…plus a brilliant opportunity to just gush at their gorgeous wedding venue. A big pat on the back to themselves for achieving what they had planned so far for their wedding!
4 Reasons to have the Final First Dance Rehearsal in the Wedding Venue:
💜 picture themselves on the dance floor and confirm where their guests will be sitting – i.e. which way to face their dance; 💜 relieve nerves with a visualisation technique used by pro performers – see this post for suggestions to enjoy every first dance step – and to imagine how it will feel when they’re in front of their guests; 💜 have a mini ‘Dress Rehearsal’ – Try out the shoes and get used to the floor type (e.g. Is it slippery, uneven?!), and try wearing a dress/skirt similar to the wedding dress – or the underskirt; 💜 get excited about being in their glorious venue. It all starts to hit home about how special their day is going to be.
Read this post about how it also worked for Caroline & Tim!
And here’s the gorgeous feedback from H & R:
“Thank you sooooo much Alison!!!! We really enjoyed our first dance and so did all of our guests!!! You were a fantastic teacher and I think Rich and I are a little sad our lessons are all over now!! Thank you so much again!! Hazel and Rich x”
🎶’Follow Me’ by the Baseballs 🎶 I do not own the rights to this music
T H I S . I S . M E. Look out world ‘cos here I come!*
Thought I’d introduce myself to some new followers, the face behind The Love of Dance.
I’m Alison, First Wedding Dance Choreographer – I founded The Love of Dance 10 years ago to help wedding planning couples who didn’t know where to begin in planning something a little special for their first dance. Most of my clients over the years have been ‘non’ dancers (I hate that phrase because everyone is a dancer in their own right!) and they needed anything from learning some basic social ballroom steps (footwork), to a first dance extravaganza choreographed for them!
I’m also a Pilates Instructor and incorporate postural strength into my service in helping couples stand tall, proud and confident on their day, or generally help them strengthen and tone. (Downward Facing Dog optional!).
I’m based in Bedfordshire but thanks to the wonder of tech I now teach couples/clients all over the UK… maybe I’ll be able to say ‘the world’ soon!
“Look out (world) ’cause here I come, And I’m marching on to the beat I drum, I’m not scared to be seen, I make no apologies, T H I S . I S . M E”
*Oh, and yes – I love The Greatest Showman. Slightly edited the words, but If ever there’s a power ballad for 21stC, that’s the song!
Love still blossoms… Online dating was the norm even before lock down. Now face timing is the only gauge of someones mannerisms and demeanour which can’t be read from a WhatsApp message, but does it give accurate enough representation of a person.
Lockdown Love & Dating
Where do singles find love at the moment?
Can a fleeting moment in a supermarket queue spark new conversation and lead to love in the aisles?
A chat with the regular delivery guy?
A nurse who helps someone back to health?
Where else do singles find love at the moment and how can we make a face time relationship meaningful and really get to know someone through a screen??
What sequence of impactful types of online meetings and conversations need to happen to embed into a singular heart, amongst a sea of other love-seeking hopefuls?
Or do we just press pause on love??
These are the questions I’m going to be taking to @Ticheabrade’s She Created Life’s brunch discusses dating and relationships. Sunday 27 April 11-1pm. The link to join is in her bio.
I can’t wait to see and hear the unique love stories that might emerge and dust themselves off out of a period of complete random circumstance affecting our planet in numerous, monumental and societal shaping ways!!
The Wedding Planning Show Goes On
While on the subject of relationship related norms that are still happening – wedding planning is still very much live. I was involved last week in an online wedding show. @BeckieMelvineventsAnti Panic Wedding Show showcased some fabulous Beds, Herts and Bucks Wedding Industry suppliers, bringing the profile of their services to the living room of wedding planning brides-to-be. You can still view the videos through the event Facebook page linked above. It’s a great time for couples to do their research, build a rapport with suppliers while they might have that extra time on their hands.
And what better way to pass the time than learning to dance together with first dance lessons brought to you in your living room! The Love of Dance’s FREE online taster lesson will give you a taster of what to expect going forward from our first dance lessons. To claim, tag 3 wedding planning friends or brides to be into the comments on the Instagram or Facebook post linked here, and I’ll be in touch!
Let’s talk those first wedding dance songs that aren’t too clichéd. Stuck for ideas? Here’s my list of first dance songs that are a little different. Cool, smooth, romantic songs which maybe haven’t been thought of by your friends, cousins – anyone else getting married around you.
Some inspiration has come through from my First Dance Clients. Some are my personal favourite songs of all time: personal to me because of my family’s music background – my dad is a jazz musician.
The first dance song will ideally represent your journey together, but not every couple has the song that perfectly summarises their relationship, reminds them of the day they met, or their first holiday together. You may not have a song that they think is suitable for a first dance – but it is YOUR day – it doesn’t have to be a clichéd love song. You dance to whatever you jolly well like. If you’re stuck, maybe by listening to lots of music, you could find the song that tells your story.
There’s a wealth of music out there on music platforms, Youtube etc. search the genre of music or artists you like; listen to remixes, instrumentals, covers by other artists. Find new music, listening to the suggestions that pop up based on your previous searches. Literally get lost in music!
When you find your song, be creative! Perhaps have it sung by a live band, personalise your song further by asking your musicians to play around with the arrangement, or find an instrumental version (a beautiful piece of music doesn’t need lyrics). TIP: Ask the band to record the final version before the wedding day so you can rehearse your dance to the song in advance!
So keep scrolling down for my list, Sit back with a glass of wine on a Friday evening – or a cuppa on your Sunday morning – with your beau and Enjoy my Spotify Playlist here.
Get in touch to find out more about how The Love Of Dance can help find the perfect song, create amazing first dance memories by teaching you to dance together through wedding dance lessons, and arrange the live music to accompany your first dance and beyond, into the evening.
If I Ain’t Got You – Alicia Keys
Can’t Take My Eyes Off You – Andy Williams
My Baby Just Cares For Me – Nina Simone
Here Comes The Sun – Nina Simone
Jose James – I’ve added Jose to my playlist because he’s covered so many soul/RnB classics, alongside writing his own tracks. His voice is like a cosy hug. Go down that maze of following his songs/albums on any music platform and enjoy his delicious voice.
Lovely Day – Bill Withers
At Last – Etta James
I Only Have Eyes For You – So many versions! Ella’s is a lovely upbeat version. The Flamingos: not everyone’s cuppa, but totally cool and chilled!
You and I (Nobody in the World) – John Legend
What a Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong (of course!)
Can we just take a moment here to appreciate how amazing Ben and Rachel are? They came to The Love Of Dance having had no dance lessons ever, nor had ever danced together in a structured way. They started their first wedding dance lessons a little later in the wedding planning timeline very close to their wedding due to unfortunate circumstances of Rachel breaking her arm. I don’t usually encourage starting so late. Some couples can get disheartened when they don’t make much progress in a short space of time, panic because there isn’t much practise time, ultimately don’t feel prepared confident as the wedding is approaching and can end up worrying about the first dance. I wanted to help Rachel and Ben as they would have started earlier if it hadn’t been for Rachel’s injury and within a space of 9 hours over two weeks they learnt a basic slow waltz.
Some people underestimate what is involved in learning a social ballroom dance. The idea of social dances is couples dance together often at a ballroom/dance club etc. without choreographed formations – unless maybe, in some styles, sequences learnt through a syllabus or dance school. They are able to lead someone they’ve not danced with before, through internationally understood leading signals – pretty clever really! The footwork may look simple, some may say repetitive, but for the lead dancer (in this case Ben) to take control, guiding a partner around the floor, usually takes quite some practise and skill:
💃🏻Thinking ahead to the next move;
🕺Giving the correct lead signal to the partner so they know where they are going in good time to be on the correct foot with their weight in the right place;
💃🏻Listening to the music to change the footwork and add in flourishes to make the dance interesting to watch;
🕺The following partner has to switch into trust, responsive mode, allowing the lead to guide around the floor without interfering – this can take practise in itself!;
💃🏻Oh – and also making sure they’re keeping the hold in the correct position to make sure they don’t step on each others’ toes!
There’s a lot going on with each step huh?!
Ben and Rachel’s final practice couldn’t have been more perfect, even with its imperfections.
💃🏻They made the most of the time we had together in their lessons.
🕺They jumped straight in and were 100% dedicated to learning.
💃🏻They practised over and over.
🕺They listened to the music to get to know their song inside and out.
💃🏻They weren’t fazed if there were any little hiccups; Ben picked up the steps again and Rachel responded!
Maybe it wasn’t down to my teaching and it was pure coincidence that these two moved so naturally together, but what we ended up with was a relaxed waltz which was so beautiful to watch, with a little simple choreographed intro to the dance…and then they were OFF – with Ben leading and Rachel had NO IDEA what moves he was going to pull out the bag!!
One word just kept recurring over and over in my feedback to them during the lessons. They danced and moved so naturally together. Whether it’s a result of how this couple have grown together over the last 10 years, knowing each other inside and out, bringing them to this point of marriage; whether it’s that it was mapped in the stars, they were destined to dance together; I feel privileged to help them realise this destiny, bringing them closer together through their First Dance Lessons.